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Title: Nothing's Ever Easy
Pairing: Toshiya x Shinya
Band: Dir en grey
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Toshiya's lover has a bad habit...

Toshiya already knew what was happening before it happened. His body was trying hard to catch up with his mind, recognizing the body pressed against his own was no longer sleeping. He suppressed a yawn so as not to alert his partner; waiting for what he knew would come. The warm chest against his back was no longer moving rhythmically, rather it moved carefully to try and avoid detection. There was a pause, suspicious, followed by a cautious whisper.

“ Are you awake?”

Toshiya lay still, waiting for the familiar feel of the bed dipping as the other went through the motions of leaving. He was rewarded a few slow seconds later as his lover rolled to the side of the bed, his legs hanging over the side. He could almost feel the burn of the intense gaze on his back. He could never be sure, but it felt as if the other were savoring this last moment; either that or building up the courage to leave. After two years he still couldn’t tell.

He was biding his time, waiting sleepily for that moment when the weight would leave the side of the bed, and it would almost be too late to act. Like every other time, he could perfectly time it, because the other man could never resist giving him a final kiss, chaste and light, before moving away. When the other pulled away from the kiss, Toshiya allowed his eyes to open; his hand quickly grabbing the other’s.

“ Don’t go. I’m awake.”

The smile he’d been holding back spread across his lips when he read the expectancy in his lover’s eyes. There was a mix of frustration and sadness, but even more than that was relief. Toshiya pulled the slender man back down to the mattress, wrapping him in a hug.

“ Shinya, what are you going to do if I don’t wake up next time?”

“ I’ll leave.”

Toshiya laughed softly, kissing the hickey he’d left only a few nights ago.

“ Oh? It’ll be that easy?”

Shinya nuzzled into his shoulder, hiding in the warmth of his body as he spoke.

“Nothing’s ever easy Toshiya.”

“Oh really?”

Toshiya lifted his chin, kissing him sweetly. He tucked back Shinya’s hair to deepen the kiss, enjoying the strong way Shinya responded, his body contradicting his earlier actions. He leaned into Toshiya, stirring both of their arousals faintly. When they finally pulled away, Toshiya took the moment to glance at the clock.

“ Four fifteen? Damn Shin, you always pick the weirdest times to run off.”

Shinya offered a small smile of apology as he slipped back underneath the covers. The bassist lifted his arm to give the other room to curl up against him. Once he was settled, Toshiya lowered his arm, making himself comfortable once more. Shinya ran his fingers lightly over the arm he’d draped over his waist.

“ How do you always know when to wake up? Do I move a lot or something?”

Toshiya sighed. “ No, not really. I can’t really explain it.”

“You’re not tired of having to stop me?”

“Sometimes…but so help me I love you. There’s nothing I can do.”

There was no response Shinya could make to that, and just that simply the conversation had ended. It had been two years since they’d started this odd relationship. It was only the result of one drunken night, a mistake on Shinya’s behalf, and somehow it had developed into this.

He was happy, Toshiya always tried to make sure he was. Honestly he’d never been in such a stable relationship and it scared him. Every few months he would get up in the middle of the night, prepared to leave. Their relationship confused him, plagued him, and fulfilled him. He didn’t want to leave, but he had an obligation to try. And yet somehow Toshiya managed to catch him each time. It was both infuriating and reassuring. He could only live with it until his guilt drove him out of bed again months from now.

As if sensing his thoughts, Toshiya gave him a soft squeeze. “ We’re flying overseas tomorrow. Stop thinking so much. You need your rest ne.”

The words were spoken drowsily, but they had the needed effect and let Shinya relax and drift into his own tired dreams. Toshiya soon joined him, a small smile still touching his lips.



Yay! My first fic of the new year with one of my favorite couples! I tell you I was sitting in possibly the most boring art lecture ever, and to escape my boredom of being bored I started thinking of mansmex and good things of that nature. Anyway it eventually led me to think about Toshiya and Shinya and one of the lines from this fic that I had written two nights earlier. I combined them and decided to make this quick ficlet. Hope it’s good. I feel like, even though it’s short it’s a bit better written since there’s more experience behind the writing than there was previously. XD We’ll see I guess. Thanks for reading!
Awww! I need a good dose of sugar every once in a while. Thanks for sharing!
X33 Thank you
seriousely...I hate this pairing -but this was so cute!!!
In my head its still the pretty bluish-black-haired toshiya
with the child-prey-blonde shinya DD:

GAH! I hate this pairing. but its so cute. damn! D:
Ahaha why do you hate this pairing?
This was actually written for their current look, but that's ok. X3 Thank youuuuu
aww this was cute. I loved it how Shinya tries to run away and Toshiya always catches him (>.<) ~
Aww ): was cute, yay you've written! O_O :: Amazed:: I thought you stopped. :x well anyway thanks for sharing woman!